I’m currently sitting down at my computer while two children are at camp and two are napping. I just had a sitter here so I could run some errands and this is the only time I really have to sit down and type. So I’m maximizing my alone time. Wow, does it feel good to have a quiet house and a second to myself!

We have really been in the thick of it lately. I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I’ve been having a hard time. So many sweet friends have complimented me on my ability to get out of the house but the truth of it is, it is required for my sanity. A change of scenery is the best recipe for behavioral success and my cabin fever. So it’s just part of my parenting strategy (and therapy).

When we came home from the hospital after having baby Will, we jumped right into our routine at home. Almost aggressively. We had friends over for dinner that night and I was back into crafting with the kids the next day. I thought keeping everyone in their routine would be the best way for them to handle the change a new baby brings and also make me feel like my old self! Things seemed to be going pretty well for a while and Eric and I were patting ourselves on the back. We’ve got this! But I would say there was a bit of a delayed reaction to the baby. After the first few weeks, the newness and adrenalin wore off and everyone started acting up and that’s the phase we are in right now. Not only has 4 babies in 5 years done a number on my body, but the commotion of lots of little people with big feelings starting our days at 5:30 has been its own emotional rollercoaster.

It’s interesting, I swear these kids want more mom mom mom but every night when I sit down to read a story, they request Dad instead. I’m the least favorite but most needed, ha. Is that just mom life? Everyone is tired around here yet fighting sleep. Bedtime feels like a marathon and sometimes I’m so frustrated I want to pull my hair out. But when we finally sit down after they’re tucked in, I stare at our family portrait on the mantle and think, how did I get so lucky?

Transitioning to a new baby, no matter if it’s your second or your fifth, is a total juggling act of their hierarchy of needs.  The other night when Eric was at a work dinner, I put all 4 kids to bed myself (go me!). At one point, I had just gotten one child into the bath after bathing someone else and then my two year old climbed back into the tub in his clothes while I ran to change the baby’s diaper and the other one was trashing his room. HA. Lately I feel like motherhood has been putting out fires right and left. Locking doors and putting kids in cribs just to keep everyone contained. Baby Will is often left to cry for a bit so I can do bath time with the others or get everyone where they need to be and I think he’ll ultimately be a relaxed kid because of this. But right now, wow! It’s a lot!

What’s helped me most is hiring help. I’m so fortunate to have some really great options for help. I have rockstar babysitters and have hired a night nanny a few nights a week which has been a game changer for my energy and mental health. Even though there are quite a few nights where I’m getting up another kid anyway, I do get some full nights of rest. With 4 under 5, that is amazing. And alone time with camp + babysitting? Now that’s a treat.

So the transition has been an expected one I’d say. And really felt the same as going from 2 to 3. Not easy. But manageable. Once you’re outnumbered, you’re outnumbered. I’ve learned that the only way to manage is to relinquish a little control and take deep breaths. Get breaks.

I know from my own childhood that our children’s age gap in this season of life (5, 4, 2, and 0) is busy and chaotic but will be SO FUN in the long run. Hopefully my children will be as close to each other as I am to my siblings. And yes, it’s a little crazy around here but boy, do I love our crew.

If you’re on the fence at all about having 4 kids and it’s something you’re leaning towards but a little scared of, I say DO it. It will be hard at first but having a new baby is hard anyway! I love having the even numbers and feeling like everyone has a buddy. And truly, we’re having so much fun.

If any of you are a first time mom, I want you to know that the HARDEST transition is going from 0-1. Having your first baby is a total shift in who you are and your new role in life and once you’ve adapted to that, you can do anything. So if it’s been a rough adjustment, it gets better. I promise! Being a parent is the most exhausting yet rewarding job. I wouldn’t have this life any other way.

Photography by J.Noel Photography :)

lessons in motherhood transitioning to 4 children