Dear Charlie,

One year. You are ONE year old my sweet boy. It seems like yesterday we were awake late at night in the hospital, just you & me, studying and taking one another in. It was 3:30 in the morning and I didn’t mind one bit. Just having you look at me was worth everything. I took your picture when you opened your eyes for the first time and it’s one of the sweetest I have ever taken. It is now framed on your bookshelf. I love it and that moment so much.

A lot has happened in the past year. A lot of learning and growing for you and me both. I’m so glad I took so many videos because even the sounds you make have changed so much. You were such a cooer, and now you love making noises at the top of your lungs and pretending to cough because it makes you laugh. You love to babble and I have a feeling you’ll be a social butterfly like your parents. Even just the other day your nursery teacher told me you couldn’t help but follow around other babies and try to play (take their toys).

You LOVE to walk your grocery cart around the playroom. You don’t really love getting your diaper changed or any time you have to lay still on your back for more than 10 seconds. You just want to be on the move, always. You’ve started asking for my attention a lot more and even though I sometimes feel exasperated, I secretly loooove how much you need and want ME.

You’re the best sleeper, ever. You began sleeping 12 hours at night at 4 months with very few regressions since. I’m not sure if your sister will be the same way! Probably not! Although you’re a great sleeper, you are not a great eater. If it were up to you, you’d have cheerios for every meal the rest of your life. But I’ve found that I can trick you a bit with some games of the spoon and I have even gotten you to eat a few veggies I didn’t think possible! It will be interesting to see what kind of eater you’ll be as you grow up.

We read the SAME books every night: Good Night Austin, Dr. Seuss’s ABC book, and Bedtime on Sesame Street. Your dad and I can recite two of those now by memory. Even though we’ve added others to the mix, we go back to those originals because you light up when I start reading and crawl over to me to help turn the pages. I guess rhyming really is more fun!

Being a mama has been the biggest blessing in my life, especially to you kiddo. And it’s also been scary! I realized that everything my parents ever told me was totally right. And now here I am, worrying about the world you live in, how it will shape you, and what I can do to teach you the best skills for navigating it.

I will do my best, every day. I promise you that.

This year has flown by and I’m afraid the next one will just as fast. You finally just started giving me cuddles at nighttime without squirming away. Your dad races upstairs in the morning “I’ll get him!” because seeing you when you first wake up is the best. I have to find a way to save all my videos to my computer so I don’t lose them. I know I’ll be taking many many more :)

Happy First Birthday Charlie! I am so excited to see what this next year holds. I love you more than words.

Love,

Mama

a letter to my baby baby first birthday dear charlie